When we are stressed, our body sends a powerful rush of chemicals (hormones) into our system which gives us a huge jolt of energy.
This immediate “turn on” is very addictive. We unconsciously and continually go to the neural pathways that give us this rush of energy, and can become addicted to the situations and circumstances that we think are stressful or negative to us (relationships, problems, circumstances).
By keeping these unfavorable things in our lives, we continue to feed our addiction to these negative emotions. We actually get a rush of energy from this the things we complain about when without this rush of energy, we would feel flat. In some sense, it gives us our sense of identity, who I am right now, the stressed out person, the angry person, the unhappy person. The Truth is many of these thoughts and emotions are habits and patterns from our past.
Dr. Joe Dispenza in his book “Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself”, says: “You are not doomed by your genes and hardwired to be a certain way for the rest of your life. A new science is emerging that empowers all human beings to create the reality they choose.”
We think 10,000 – 50,000 thoughts per day. The majority of those thoughts are the same thoughts every day until we decide we want something different and do something about it.
Knowing you turn on this stress response simply by thinking, wouldn’t you think you can stop it by changing what you are thinking? After all it's your thoughts that create your emotions.
Most people believe the stress is caused by other people, circumstances, and situations, and try to change those things when it's the patterns of thinking and believing that are the cause.
While you don't consciously choose the addictive nature of the rush of hormones that your reaction creates, it is just the comfortable and familiar place to stay. Trying to change it may be difficult because of that addictive rush that the pattern brings.
The thoughts and feelings generated in this emotional state are self-limiting and keep us bound to all the problems and circumstances, the stressors and choices that produce adrenaline in the first place. It’s the vicious cycle - we unconsciously keep these things around so we can get that boost of energy and reinforce that “this is just who I am.”
By staying addicted to this rush of energy we get, we stay bound to all the problems, conditions, and stressors; but when we truly get that we are not our emotions, we are not our circumstance, we are not our bodies, and know without a doubt that we are far more than that, we can actually decide to let go of that pattern, tap into the infinite intelligence running through us and for us, and choose another option that works for us.
The important word here is DECIDE.
When you realize that your life isn’t working as well as you’d love, the next step is to make a decision that you want and deserve a better quality of life – health, relationships, vocation, money, free time.
Then find the right system of support and guidance to guide you through the changes. Your thought and belief patterns have been in place a long time, and it will take time to make significant changes.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and you, too can create a life you love. Be patient with yourself and know that it is possible.
Tips to get you started:
1. Next time you feel stressed, get worried or upset, pause and notice.
2. Ask yourself: what am I thinking right now that has me feeling this way?
3. Ask yourself: Is this a pattern? Is what I'm thinking really true or a story I am telling myself?
4. Try this little trick: Tell yourself that you will postpone gettting upset or worried again until 3 days from now. Put an hour on your calendar 3 days from now and come back then and worry or be upset.