I had an interesting coaching session recently with one of my clients. This client originally came to see me for help with his challenges of impatience with his children, a rebellious 15 year old son, moderate depression, social anxiety, and irritability with his wife. He had an overall feeling that his life just didn’t work. Over the course of three months of weekly sessions, we had cleared out a tremendous amount of limiting beliefs about himself and his life.
In last week’s session my client said he felt happy and good about his life and that now he wanted to start his own business. He shared with me that he knew he was very competent and capable yet he felt he needed support to take action. By the end of our session he had agreed to take certain action steps towards starting his own business. However when I checked in with him the following session I discovered that he had done nothing!
Instead of offering accountability coaching which is very common in the traditional coaching world, I have a different approach. Any time a person has a challenge there is always a very good reason why! My belief is it is because limiting beliefs and emotions are operating which hold people back or cause their problem. When those limiting beliefs and emotions are identified and cleared that challenge simply disappears. I know that sounds too simple but it’s true.
So I muscle checked (an advanced way to see which beliefs are “on” or “off”) on behalf of my client: “I want to take action towards starting my business,” and I got a “no.” So we started digging for the core sabotaging beliefs and emotions that were blocking him from taking action.
Immediately it was identified that my client had a deep fear of failure — which is very common. So we spent the next 20 minutes identifying and clearing out the limiting beliefs around failure. Here are a few beliefs: “failure means embarrassment, shame, and not good enough.”
When we had completed the major clearings around this topic, I asked my client how he felt about moving forward with starting his business. He answered: “I don’t really feel worried about failing any longer, however what’s up for me now is that I have a fear about succeeding.” So we addressed this issue and cleared his beliefs around: “Successful people are not liked,” “When I am successful I will leave people that are important to me behind,” “Being successful means I will be a target,” and another very common belief “If I am more successful than my Dad, it will make him feel less than.”
At the end of our session my client felt good about taking action and moving forward. When I checked in with him the following week he had taken action on the first steps towards starting his own business!
Results like these are what my clients experience every session and demonstrate the power of the system I developed called the Holistic Emotional Makeover™.
What is holding you back from taking action and achieving your goals and desires? What would your life look like and feel like if your barriers were gone and you were taking effective action with ease?